I didn’t write much here in 2014. When I was being mentored by SARK, I had grandiose ideas about writing on Transcendent Journey’s blog every day. SARK cautioned me not to play into my inner critic’s possible recriminations if I didn’t write daily. She suggested I just write when my muse inspired me. So, I listened to her wisdom and spent much of my time in my own daily explorations. I thought it might be helpful for you, if I did a series of posts about what I’ve found worked for me as I took various steps along my path in 2014, because I imagine what worked for me will work for you.
It’s Okay to Acknowledge that
Your Path Isn’t Working for You
When you’ve been on the spiritual path for almost 30 years, you’ve seen it all — the good, the bad, and the ugly. For some, choosing and following a spiritual discipline like yoga or a specific teacher is a good thing, especially if folk have a high degree of faith that the discipline or working with a mentor ultimately will give the results they seek. My journey started out that way. I worked with the Archangel Michael daily, learning various disciplines that supported my burgeoning spiritual gifts. Even when he woke me up at 3:00 a.m. to drive two hours to go to a church I’d never been to and connect with a man I’d find there, I had faith that somehow keeping my commitment to work with AA Michael was in my best interests.
When I was electrocuted in 1999, my connections and journey fell apart, and I felt lost and angry. I had spent most of my energy in world service and money on honing my spiritual path. Because my world service took up so much time, I only had a part-time job and no health insurance at that point. I couldn’t even afford to go to the hospital in an ambulance. Even though miracles of healing came to me, despite the lack of formal health care, I remained angry and enforced a new rule that I wouldn’t return to the pattern of helping others until I could help myself.
After seven years of intense physical healing, I finally was out of bed and mobile. So, I started looking for small ways to pay it forward, as an acknowledgement of the healing I had received. I also started looking around for a spiritual community. I wanted help to fix what I felt was broken in me and to hang out with like-minded people. I continued this exploration, but it became apparent that I wasn’t getting any closer to achieving my goals.
I worked this part of my journey with a great deal of commitment, but the results were negligible from my perspective. I didn’t care whether I had connections to more guides and teachers. I wasn’t looking for another energy fix or paranormal experience. I did not want to hear about the glories of doing more world service. I was looking for concrete improvements in my ability to take care of myself — a way to purchase different supplements, have chiropractic care and massages on a regular basis, and contribute more to our household.
Correcting the Wrongness of Me
I continued to struggle. I wasn’t getting the measurable results I wanted and was getting harshly judged for my refusal to go back into world service for the greater good, while I was struggling and frustrated. In fact one of the things that really triggered me was the whole basis for most of the teachings and methods in the West. Most seemed based on the notion that I was not what I needed to be, that something about me was defective or missing, and that until I acquired that “Secret,” I would continue to struggle to care for myself. That’s when I realized that working to correct the wrongness of me didn’t actually produce good results, and I stopped wasting time, energy, and money to correct my wrongness.
Why Correcting the Wrongness
Doesn’t Work
I spent quite a bit of time contemplating and talking with trusted colleagues about why correcting the wrongness of me wasn’t working. What we discovered over the last year is that the realities where we focus on rightness and wrongness are polarized and part of experiencing separation. In order for people to have clear choices, there are opposites — right/wrong, good/bad, light/dark, joy/pain. The tension between these opposites creates separation, and the separation remains stable by keeping the light quotient (the amount of light compared to the amount of not light) at a 50/50 level. In fact, the light quotient of separation remains 50/50, with a margin for movement of 5 points in either direction.
So, what does this mean? In separation, adjustments to the tension created by opposites have to be made to keep the light quotient, and, therefore, the reality stable. So, information, processes, procedures, etc. work for some people, some of the time. And, if a particular pattern is extremely successful, it will be balanced by a pattern that is not successful at all. So, the extremes in the polarity are balanced in an extreme fashion, with almost everything in the middle experiencing moderate success at least some of the time.
Let me give you an example from the spiritual path. Let’s say you know people who study NLP (neurolinguistic programming). They use all of the tools almost religiously. Some students get stellar results all of the time; some will get desirable results some of the time; and some will never get what they want from this system. The truth of the matter is that this pattern will remain static with very little variance as long as there is separation. This is the nature of separation and how separation realities are maintained.
The key here is that most teachers and practitioners don’t know that the light quotient is programmed for stability at 50/50. They don’t understand that their system is part of the separation. So, they will effort to correct the wrongness of students, the wrongness of practice, the wrongness of other teachers. In my view, this type of correction is a complete waste of time, doesn’t speak to the truth of what is happening, and most of the time is ineffective. The problem is not the wrongness of you or what you are doing. The issue is that you are experiencing the finer points of separation and having an active demonstration of how the light quotient is balanced in separation.
Is My Life Hopelessly Stuck?
The answer to that question emphatically is, “No!” But, you have to be willing to come out of the conditioning of the world that keeps you locked into separation. In my next post, “Moving into Oneness,” I will be discussing how I began creating a more enriching, joyful, easier life for myself and my family. Please join me on this leg of my journey. I’ve experienced more smiles and laughter in the last several weeks than I have in years!
Ying Yang Sign courtesy of: DonkeyHotey [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons